No, not the tests you’re probably thinking of. I spent some time on Sunday helping an ex with his deck, along with two of his other friends. He brought up how the current girl (he’s not really dating her since she lives on another continent) passed his tests. Obviously I didn’t pass. He claimed that everyone has tests. Women especially. “Every time a woman opens her mouth it’s a test.”

I disagree. I can’t even say that I have tests for a relationship. Of course, I have things I want and don’t want. When I was much younger, I did test guys. I wanted to see how much they would put up with. But for the past 10 years, I haven’t seen the need for relationship tests. He claimed that I tested him, but when asked for an example, he couldn’t give one. He said my question was a test. One of his friends agreed with me–that not everyone tests.

However, if people are running around testing their loved ones, how in the world can one pass? You’re not even aware that a particular event or incident is a test. I know my ex tested me. I can even give examples that were obvious tests. It’s stupid though. Instead how about creating what you want in a relationship and having it show up. Viola! No tests necessary. No need to have a checklist with pass or fail. No need to tally the passes and fails. What kind of measure is that of a relationship? Isn’t it supposed to be do you enjoy the other person’s company or not? Simple.

If people are running around giving secret elaborate tests, how does anyone pass? How does anyone stay together? If that is what is happening, it’s no wonder that I’m single. No matter what, you’re bound to fail. It’s a setup. Win-Lose.