Tell Me What You Think
10/07/2006
Today I want to get readers’ responses. I have something I’ve been thinking about that I’m not sure I have a reasonable answer to. So readers, how soon is too soon to have sex in relationship? How long should you hold out?
My experience has been that once you start having sex that is mostly what you do, and it becomes very difficult to get to know the person. Often you get so emotionally attached to the person that you overlook the fact that you don’t really get along.
Keith said,
October 8, 2006 @ 2:05 am
Sex and relationships are two different things???…
You can have both but what are you looking for as being lasting???…
You can have Sex with anyone on the Planet anytime you want if both are willing but who can you have a lasting relationship with???…
Liz said,
October 8, 2006 @ 12:11 pm
Nothing like answering a question with more questions. I have to agree that you can have sex anytime if both are willing. Are you suggesting that finding a lasting relationship is difficult? If so, I would agree with that as well.
thealphafry said,
October 8, 2006 @ 1:47 pm
I think it depends on the situation and the maturity of the two people involved. I wouldn’t recommend teenagers to start having sex right away.. But as soon as you hit your 20s… as long as you feel comfortable with it, why not start in a week or two days or the first date? It’s not particularly sleazy if you both know you’re not the type to have one night stands and WANT to get to know eachother.
CyberCelt said,
October 8, 2006 @ 8:54 pm
Hormones get in the way of thinking processes. When we are attracted it is hard not to have sex. However, you should wait until you know the person with whom you want to have sex.
People are not always who they appear to be. Make sure you know the real person before you commit.
Scott from Oregon said,
October 9, 2006 @ 6:07 pm
Well, unless it is me you are referring to, I would suggest holding off a wee bit. Not too long, mind you, but a period long enough to figure out if other aspects of your life are going to mesh.
Lordy, who knows how long that is? Only you can ascertain whether you think you have found something that will last or just something gratifying for the moment.
As I said, unless it was me, you were thinking of, I’d suggest an actual period of courting and dating.
Save the slamma jammas for when you are sure you’re gonna like the way this guy makes coffee in the mornings and his personal habits and his friends and family…
Liz said,
October 9, 2006 @ 6:14 pm
So Scott, if I was referring to you, does that mean I shouldn’t wait?
Scott from Oregon said,
October 12, 2006 @ 12:51 am
Well, yes. If you were referring to me, you should get right to it.
Actually, te point I was trying to make was that we all have rules and such we give to others, but we don’t tend to follow them for ourselves.
In other words, I would highly recommend that you not just jump in the sack with a guy you think you like, but I would probably not suggest that if that person was me…