Ever thought about the way we adapt to our circumstances? I have become quite adapted to being single. Not that I was ever part of a couple for very long really. I was fairly self-sufficient all along, but it’s now an artform. I really don’t need a man around. Any simple thing that needs fixed, I can do. If I can’t, I can hire someone. Even then it’s mostly for things I don’t have the expertise to do: auto repair and electricity. I don’t mess with electricity anymore. One incident a long time ago scared me for life. I have the burnt pliers to prove it. They were still useable—if a bit tarnished and melted—so I kept them. Even with all the electricity off to the house, I won’t mess with it. Over the years I’ve acquired quite a few tools, including power tools, like a drill. They are very useful for hanging curtains and blinds. Originally I bought it so I could hang my speakers for the entertainment system I bought.

See, I have learned to buy my own electronics and cars. It’s amazing what you can do when there is no one else around to do it for you. You may wonder why I didn’t ask any male friends to help. They either didn’t help, refused to help or were too busy to help.

Now, while I think being so self-sufficient is a good thing, not all men (or women) agree. I think men prefer women who need help. They like to swoop in and help—particularly if it’s something that requires strength or knowledge.

Technorati: self-sufficient, single women, tools

I’m stuck again. I thought taking a break from posting might help me come up with something, but it hasn’t. Perhaps I need amore exciting life, or perhaps I need to take a new look and realize that it’s not as boring as it seems. Again, there are the things I don’t write about, which–if I did–would give me plenty to write about and some interesting stories as well.

I’m heading into a busy day. I have a quick interview this afternoon. I have some work that I need to finish up and my typical Monday work to do. I still haven’t written that abstract for the presentation (I need to review that too). However, that will probably take me less than 15 minutes. It’s just easy to forget.

I spent most of my uneventful weekend sleeping. I’m not sure why I was so tired. So while lots of people were out dressed in costumes for weekend parties, I was at home. I’m still working on learning and perfecting one hula routine. I have another one I need to write down the steps to that I’m expecting to get down this week. I have a test in hula next week. I’m so thrilled.

What’s up with Blogger? I haven’t written about all the problems–lots of other blogger users have though. I saw their news and explanation for all the down time, but it’s ridiculous. Every day? Or nearly? I wish it were easy to change blog services, but I would need to pay for a template re-write.

I now have two interviews coming up. One is just a simple one-on-one meeting on Monday. The other one is an all day ordeal complete with a presentation. They even requested a title and abstract prior to the interview. Am I just out of college? Crazy. I dug out an old presentation from my graduate school work. Thank goodness it had notes. It may not be a great presentation (it was once when I knew the stuff better), but it will have to do. I think I will take a friend’s advice to act like I don’t really need their job. Actually, I don’t at the moment, and I’m not sure I even want either one. Although hunting up projects is no picnic, I would much rather do that and have control over my life. There’s something about being required to be at work especially when I don’t want to be (say weekends, evenings–over and over) that just pisses me off. I guess she’s seen this attitude work to her advantage. I think I can see why. Desparation–the opposite–is never attractive.

Also–silly me–I signed up for National Novel Writing Month. I guess I thought it might be a good kick in the butt–a goal even. But, along with other great writers, I’m an expert procrastinator when it comes to writing. I’ve put it off for years, even though I think I have a novel somewhere that needs extracted. Sounds painful. It starts November 1. I began a little something after my nap, but I have no idea where it’s going. My worst problem has always been coming up with a topic. The writing comes along fine once I have some sort of minimal plot and characters to work with. I just never make it that far. Then comes the worst–finding someone to buy it and publish it. At least I hear that’s the worst. My mother has a friend with a great novel, according to everyone who has read it, who keeps tinkering with it and hasn’t bothered to find a publisher. Everyone gets stuck at a different point. If you have an interest in writing a novel and think that a goal and the possibility of meeting with others with the same goal would be helpful, you should sign up.

Technorati: work, interviews, novel, writing

Yesterday I tried to take some good pictures with my camera. I have an advanced digital camera, which means I have plenty of control over the shot, but only have one lens. Every picture when enlarged has jaggies. I don’t understand it. I’ve tried everything I know to control it, and the only thing left as a reason is that the camera just isn’t good enough. It’s 5.1 megapixels, which should be fine. I would like to get a new camera–a real digital SLR–but I will have to save up to get one.

Should anyone try to give some advice…yes, I am using the highest resolution possible. Yes, I used a tripod (my hands aren’t that steady for up close work). I think it should be easier to get quality photos than this. I just think that in order to reduce the problems I am having that I need more megapixels.

Technorati: digital photography

To state the obvious, we are nearly at the end of October. It won’t be long before the new year is here. Funny how time passes so quickly. As a child, I remember time moved at a snail’s pace, unless it was summer.

I’m also close to it being 3 months since I restarted this blog. A lot has happened to this blog since then. Although some days, I have no idea where it is going. Maybe that is the point–it follows the same flow as my life. Which brings to mind those crazy questions as to where you will be in 5 years. See, lately I’ve had a few interviews. I’m not the best at lying by saying “oh, still at your company, perhaps in management.” I have no idea where I will be in 5 years, and it doesn’t really matter. My experience has shown that all the planning in the world doesn’t usually work out. It’s better just to go with the flow. My life always changes–sometimes very quickly. The one constant is my life is change. I used to hate it. I fought it. Now, I can’t imagine it being any different. It took years to learn to enjoy the fast-paced change.

So where am I going (with this blog or life)? I don’t know, but I will enjoy the ride.

Well now hula is kicking my butt. We have a “recital” coming up November 26. It’s fundraiser: dinner and dancing. I have three routines to learn. I know most of them, but they aren’t perfect. I’m still sore from Sunday’s hula workshop. I’m hardly moving this morning.

Last night every time my cats woke me up I was singing the songs in my head. Fun. I needed the sleep. The cats kept me up for an hour because two of them decided to chase each other through the house fighting. They like to fight under the bed. All that hissing and yowling…I just know there are tufts of cat hair under there. I don’t know how they fit under the bed. I store boxes of sweaters under there. I suppose I should look under the bed to examine the damage, but I’m afraid to. They have been fighting under there for days.

So you can imagine me barely able to get on the floor shuffling the stuff under the bed so I can vacuum while swearing to the cats. Oh, those aren’t my cats in the photo. There’s no way I would be able to catch my cats fighting on film.

Technorati: hula, cat fight, fur

Last night I watched a program on vampires on the Biography Channel. It covered a little history and interviewed people who claim to be vampires. I’m curious. Do people think there really are vampires? Is it possible to be one? Frankly, I’m not sure that being pale or having a reaction to the sun truly counts. I meet that criteria. Does liking the taste of blood make you one? Or, does it just mean you have an unusual taste? Anyone want to tell me the fascination with vampires?

See that was probably the most interesting thing I did all evening. It was Monday. No dates on Mondays. All of these reminds me that Halloween is coming up, and that means I have to hide my black cat. Poor baby. He has a tendency to try to run outside–although not lately. It’s funny that black cats have such a poor reputation here. In Spain, black cats are lucky. I’ve heard that in other countries black cats are considered lucky. He really is the sweetest cat too. I adopted him because no one wanted an all black cat.

I don’t typically go to Halloween parties. Not sure why. I like costume parties. I think there should be more of them–not just at Halloween. Perhaps I don’t like the ghoulishness of Halloween. I don’t know. I wasn’t allowed to go trick-or-treating growing up.

P.S. Please check out some of the advertisers.

Technorati: vampire, Halloween, black cat

I hate dating. A friend of mine thinks of dating as like the song “Love Stinks” by the J. Geils Band. For those who don’t know this song, it’s about how one person likes another, who likes a different person, etc. I think there’s some truth to it. Funny how it seems that the person you’re really into often isn’t that into you.

Another person I know asked “isn’t dating just getting to know someone?” I guess there’s some truth to that as well, but it’s more than that. There are often unspoken expectations by both people that really get in the way of getting to know someone. Then there is the fact that it isn’t always easy to get to know someone. Most people play the game of I-want-to-tell-you-who-I-am-but-if-you-find-out-the-
real-me-you-will-leave. So they tell you half-truths, and you have to discover the rest yourself. Some are very good at hiding their true selves for a long time. Many people don’t even know who they are or what they want, so they can’t tell you. The guys often play I-want-to-get-into-your-pants-so-I-will-pretend-to-want-to-
know-you. So then I’m left figuring out whether or not the guy actually wants to get to know me.

I often feel it’s a waste of my time to go on a date with someone when it’s so awful that I’d rather be anywhere else—like the dentist or maybe the gynecologist. Both of those can be less painful and more fun than a date. And getting a free meal? Men hardly do that anymore. It’s more each pays their own way. Sitting through dinner can be agony. If a guy does offer to pay, then you have to wonder if he will be expecting some sort of “payment” in return. No, not all think this way, but an amazing number do.

It’s coming up on holidays when it’s time to visit family again. My mother never gives me a problem about being single. It’s my aunt who does. The day I gave her an announcement of my doctoral graduation, she burst out asking if it was a wedding invitation. As if that is the best a woman can aspire to. That graduation was far more important than any wedding. I’ve thought of some smart retorts. The best comes from a book I bought called “Even God Is Single (so stop giving me a hard time)” by Karen Salmansohn. Here are a couple of my favorites:

“Over 50% of marrieds undo their “I dos”. The way I see it, being careful about whom I marry just means I’ve skipped a few divorces.”

A funny quote from her Granma Nan: “Why make one man happy, when you can make a lot of men happy?”

And one of the best: “It’s easy to become married. 2.3 million people do it a year. If you want to pressure me to become something, hey, why not pick something a little more challenging—like an astrophysicist.”

I was married once. It wasn’t bliss. The divorce was the best thing that ever happened. I got to go to graduate school. Now, I didn’t become an astrophysicist, but I did get that doctorate in chemistry doing laser spectroscopy, no less. What is that, you ask? Ever see “Real Genius”? It’s kind of like that, but the lasers I used couldn’t vaporize people. They could burn your hand pretty good though if you were silly enough to forget that the beam was there (it was invisible).

So, yeah, I hate dating. I’ll bet lots of single people do. I think I’ll go now and take Granma Nan’s advice.

Technorati: dating, single

You may notice a few changes. Since I can’t use AdSense anymore, I’m putting up new ads. However, there will only be a few and only those that I actually endorse or use. I’m a Netflix member. I really enjoy it because of the large selection of independent and foreign movies. It’s not that I only watch those movies. It’s that after watching all of the main releases, I still need more to see to really come out on my membership. I get 3 at a time, and I watch 3 movies a week. I added Match.com and Chemistry.com. I have some experience with Match and since Chemistry is a new service launched by Match, my guess is that it is a quality site. The good thing about Match.com is the number of people on the site. Many dating sites don’t have the membership, which means the selection is small.

So if any of the ads you see interest you, please check them out. I will be adding a couple of new ones and probably rotating them, so there are only a few ads at any given time. I don’t expect it to really make me any money. I would just like to break even with the expenses of the blog. I was nearly there when AdSense was disabled.

Technorati: ads

When E. found out about my blog, he wanted to know if I had written about him.

“No.”
“Why not?”

I’m thinking at time why would he want me to write about him? I hardly know what to say. But, I’m going to give it a try.

E. was a pretty serious love for a year and half. We had fun. He would at least concede that. He’s a good-looking guy and keeps in good shape. He’s not terribly tall—in fact we are almost the same height. He also has quite a bit of body hair—which he hates—and I loved. If you had asked me about hairy men before I met him, I would have said, “yuck.” But his was soft and petable. To this day, he thinks I’m crazy for that.

Then there was his smell. No, not that kind of smell—a natural smell. He doesn’t wear scented stuff of any kind. I loved—still love—his smell. Again, he thinks it is weird. I’ve never liked someone’s natural smell so much in my life. I even have smell memories. Ever thought of someone while they are away and then smelled them? I have. He has a job that requires him to be out of town a lot. One time when he left for a few weeks, I made him leave me a worn shirt. I know he thought I was nuts, but smelling that shirt made me feel that he was close by.

We could talk for hours about everything—still can. We got along better than I have with anyone. Why did it end? You’ll have to ask E. because I have no reasonable explanation. I’m sure my being unemployed didn’t help things. I’m sure I acted needy, maybe even clingy. I had lost my job and most of my friends, except him. And then the bottom fell out of my life: no job, no friends, no boyfriend. I couldn’t date for a long time without being reminded of him. Well, I still remember now and then. We’re still friends, and we find time on rare occasions to catch up.